You may, or may not, have seen that "Smashis" has changed names to Zingah, but mores that he has cleaned out his social media and is about to embark on a new wing. He wants to get a few things off his chest beginning with this open letter and it reads...
"In all honesty I have no idea where to start, fortunately that’s a place to start…
Maybe a back story is necessary: I wasn’t always the best behaved kid in school, I’m talking getting chased out of class, Saturday detentions, suspensions and on many occasions almost getting expelled. Through all that though I’ve always had this thing deep down inside me, a goal of sorts. And that was to NEVER fail a grade, to complete school (Gr 1-12) in record time. Regardless of what happens going through to the next grade was always the end result, I just never had seen myself as the type not to.
Anyway, I made it through record time, easily at that (lol). Fast forward; I find myself having become a rapper, and all that comes with it. That means cameras, women, television, flights, clothes, V.I.P, backstage, fans, followers, celebrity, shades at night, champagne, fake friends, envy, hate, ego… the list is endless! It all came within a blink of an eye, and within the next blink I could feel and see myself losing it (scary as shit). After yet another blink I realized I actually had lost it, and not just the “rap life”, myself too (damn!). We are familiar with the concept of losing things, but losing yourself is a whole ‘nother level!
The thing about losing yourself is: You have no Idea how or when, and how or where exactly you find yourself again. Not only that, but even coming to the realization that you’ve lost such a thing of value takes time. The worst part is that in a world of technology giving us every single shortcut that exists in life, in all categories, there is absolutely NO shortcut for this journey (maybe I should tell Apple to work on one).
I honestly wish soul searching was as easy as googling myself (as said by KO, lol), but unfortunately some of the genius we sprout is just word play. So it has taken me at least 4 years, every day, every second and minute of the day to finally find my soul!! (insert many dancing emojis)… And with that comes a reform of many things to do with myself, my life and my career. And also most importantly the realization that Smashis failed a grade!
Smashis failed a grade?!! (insert eyes and face covering emojis)… He failed. He a failed a grade, in life. And becomes I am still the kid I grew up as, with all the same standards, that is just unacceptable!! (LOL). It just is NOT. Which brings us to the new favourite question: “Why the name change”. Well it is really just that simple; I AM NOT GONNA BE THE GUY THAT FAILED A GRADE!! (LOL), I’m just not! It’s just not my style, it’s not where I’m at… I’m sorry, just can’t do it. Not me. (no offense to those that failed grades in school, it’s just an analogy. lol)
Which then brings us to Zingah, a name I will not explain here but rather in person. Now of course there are people I wouldn’t have come this far without, with being careful not to do the typical rapper thing and send shout outs, it’s important I mention a couple. My squaa: Farx, Goms, Menzi & Dlomo. My girlfriend Elle, you killed it (wink).
To my new friend Stilo, you literally picked me up from the ground, dusted me off and took me running with you. That’s pricless!
To Nasty C, you reminded me who I am, why I’m here and got me back on my shit. Thank you
And then to Riky Rick, you taught me that it isn’t what you do in this world, but the spirit you do it in. That being myself completely is what they’ll love me for. And that doing things right, and with love clears our journey.
Lastly, KO… (sigh). You did a lot man, you even went as far as tearing me apart from my dreams when you saw me lose the human being that I was, and am today again. Thank you SO much!! I get it now. I’ma go get it now, the right way this time.
I’ve disappointed a lot of people, which is good because it means that many people believed in me. And in closing I would just like to ask that you’ll put me on guestlist for the I TOLD YOU SO party you’ll are going to throw after this letter…
Yours truly Lawd Of The Jig"